Freebsd Fortunes 7

When all else fails, EAT!!!

When all else fails, pour a pint of Guinness in the gas tank, advance
the spark 20 degrees, cry "God Save the Queen!", and pull the starter
knob.
                -- MG "Series MGA" Workshop Manual

When all else fails, read the instructions.

When all else fails, try Kate Smith.

When all other means of communication fail, try words.

When among apes, one must play the ape.

When angry, count four; when very angry, swear.
                -- Mark Twain

When arguments fail, use a blackjack.
                -- Ed "Spike" O'Donnell

When arguments fail, use a blackjack.
                -- Edward "Spike" O'Donnell, Al Capone associate.

When asked the definition of "pi":
The Mathematician:
        Pi is the number expressing the relationship between the
        circumference of a circle and its diameter.
The Physicist:
        Pi is 3.1415927, plus or minus 0.000000005.
The Engineer:
        Pi is about 3.