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May 24, 2017
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Fortune: 1493 - 1502 of 2298 from Freebsd Fortunes 5

Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1493 of 2298

Psychics will soon lead dogs to your body.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1494 of 2298

Psychoanalysis is that mental illness for which it regards itself
a therapy.
                -- Karl Kraus

Psychiatry is the care of the id by the odd.

Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.
                -- C.G. Jung
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1495 of 2298

psychologist, n:
        Someone who watches everyone else when an attractive woman walks
        into a room.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1496 of 2298

Psychologists think they're experimental psychologists.
Experimental psychologists think they're biologists.
Biologists think they're biochemists.
Biochemists think they're chemists.
Chemists think they're physical chemists.
Physical chemists think they're physicists.
Physicists think they're theoretical physicists.
Theoretical physicists think they're mathematicians.
Mathematicians think they're metamathematicians.
Metamathematicians think they're philosophers.
Philosophers think they're gods.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1497 of 2298

Psychology.  Mind over matter.
Mind under matter?  It doesn't matter.
Never mind.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1498 of 2298

Public use of any portable music system is a
virtually guaranteed indicator of sociopathic tendencies.
                -- Zoso
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1499 of 2298

Publishing a volume of verse is like dropping
a rose petal down the Grand Canyon and waiting for the echo.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1500 of 2298

Pudder's Law:
        Anything that begins well will end badly.
        (Note: The converse of Pudder's law is not true.)
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1501 of 2298

Punning is the worst vice, and there's no vice versa.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1502 of 2298

Puns are little "plays on words" that a certain breed of person loves to
spring on you and then look at you in a certain self-satisfied way to indicate
that he thinks that you must think that he is by far the cleverest person
on Earth now that Benjamin Franklin is dead, when in fact what you are
thinking is that if this person ever ends up in a lifeboat, the other
passengers will hurl him overboard by the end of the first day even if they
have plenty of food and water.
                -- Dave Barry
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