Humor, quotes, proverbs, aphorisms, maxims & adages - Linux-Unix (FreeBSD) Fortune Cookies

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Daily fortunes for your site

Dec 22, 2024

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Welcome to Motd

Message of the day, also known as "fortunes" or "fortune cookies", derived from various FreeBSD and Linux sources.

Have a phrase/quote/joke in mind but only remember something somewhat vaguely? The search box (left) may yield some pleasant surprises.

A staple for Unix/Linux users for decades, but largely unknown to the public, it's hard to describe this incredible collection. Not only

amusing, arch, facetious, pithy, humorous, ironic, jocose, keen, satirical, sharp, smart, taunting, witty, biting ...

the collection is also a fascinating view of the cultural history of the computer, priesthood and users, through the Unix looking glass.

Enjoy! and don't forget to vote for your favorite "Best" and "Worst" of Fortunes.

Advisory: Occasional strong language. Discretion advised specially for the Limericks.

Today's Fortunes

Dec 22, 2024

And yet, seasons must be taken with a grain of salt, for they...
And yet, seasons must be taken with a grain of salt, for they too have a sense of humor, as does history. Corn stalks comedy, comedy stalks tragedy, and this too is historic. And yet, still, when corn meets tragedy face to face, we have politics. --...

And you can't get any Watney's Red Barrel, because the bars...
And you can't get any Watney's Red Barrel, because the bars close every time you're thirsty...

"And, you know, I mustn't preach to you, but surely...
"And, you know, I mustn't preach to you, but surely it wouldn't be right for you to take away people's pleasure of studying your attire, by just going and making yourself like everybody else. You feel that, don't you?" said he, earnestly. --...

Andrea's Admonition: Never bestow profanity upon...
Andrea's Admonition: Never bestow profanity upon a driver who has wronged you. If you think his window is closed and he can't hear you, it isn't and he can.

ANDROPHOBIA: Fear of men.
ANDROPHOBIA: Fear of men.

Daily Fortunes for Dec 22, 2024 (today)

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