Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Wednesday October 19, 2016

While anyone can admit to themselves they were wrong, the true...
While anyone can admit to themselves they were wrong, the true test is admission to someone else.

Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that...
Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song? -- Stephen Wright

An Argentine gaucho named Bruno Who said, "Fucking is...
An Argentine gaucho named Bruno Who said, "Fucking is one thing I do know. Women are fine And sheep are divine But llamas are numero uno."

There once was a man from Madras, Whose balls were made out...
There once was a man from Madras, Whose balls were made out of brass. When they clanged together, They played "Stormy Weather", And lightning shot out of his ass.

There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled lots of gin...
There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled lots of gin on his weeney So just to be couth He added vermouth And slipped his best girl a martini.

There was a young lady named Banker, Who slept while the ship...
There was a young lady named Banker, Who slept while the ship lay at anchor, She woke in dismay, When she heard the mate say, "Now hoist up the topsheet and spanker."

There was a young man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long...
There was a young man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, While wiping his chin, "If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it."

There was a young man from Rangoon Who used to lament 'neath...
There was a young man from Rangoon Who used to lament 'neath the moon That he had the luck To be born of a fuck That was scraped off the sheets with a spoon.