Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Wednesday January 11, 2017

There once was a man from Racine, Who invented a screwing...
There once was a man from Racine, Who invented a screwing machine. Both concave and convex, It could please either sex, But, oh, what a bastard to clean!

There was a gay dog from Ontario Who fancied himself...
There was a gay dog from Ontario Who fancied himself a Lothario. At a wench's glance He'd snatch off his pants And make for her Mons Venerio.

There was a young girl named Sapphire Who succumbed to...
There was a young girl named Sapphire Who succumbed to her lover's desire. She said, "It's a sin, But now that it's in, Could you shove it a few inches higher?"

There was a young girl who begat Three babies named Nat,...
There was a young girl who begat Three babies named Nat, Pat and Tat. T'was fun in the breeding But hell in the feeding When she found there's no tit for Tat.

There was an old woman of Ghent Who swore that her cunt had...
There was an old woman of Ghent Who swore that her cunt had no scent. She got fucked so often At last she got rotten, And didn't she stink when she spent.

There's a charming young lady named Beaulieu Who's often been...
There's a charming young lady named Beaulieu Who's often been screwed by yours truly, But now--it's appallin'-- My balls always fall in! I fear that I've fucked her unduly.

There's a lovely young lady named Shittlecock Who loves to play...
There's a lovely young lady named Shittlecock Who loves to play diddle and fiddle-cock, But her cunt's got a pucker That's best not to fuck, or When least you expect it to, it'll lock.