Humor: Best of Fortunes for Sunday January 27, 2019

There was a young Scot in Madrid Who got fifty-five fucks for...
There was a young Scot in Madrid Who got fifty-five fucks for a quid. When they said, "Are you faint?" He replied, "No, I ain't, But I don't feel as good as I did."

There was a young lady named Ciss Who said, "I think...
There was a young lady named Ciss Who said, "I think skating's a bliss " But she'll never restate, For a wheel off her skate .siht ekil gnihtemos pu hsinif reh edaM

There was a young lady named Rose Who fainted whenever...
There was a young lady named Rose Who fainted whenever she chose; She did so one day While playing croquet, But was quickly revived with a hose. -- Edward Gorey

There was a young lady of Twickenham Who thought men had...
There was a young lady of Twickenham Who thought men had not enough prick in 'em. On her knees every day To God she would pray To lengthen and strengthen and thicken 'em.

There was a young man from Kent Whose tool was so long that...
There was a young man from Kent Whose tool was so long that it bent. To save himself trouble He put it in double And instead of coming, he went.

There was an old hermit named Dave Who kept a dead whore in...
There was an old hermit named Dave Who kept a dead whore in his cave. He said "I'll admit I'm a bit of a shit, But look at the money I save."