Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of March, 2018

There was a young man from Kent Whose tool was so long that...
There was a young man from Kent Whose tool was so long that it bent. To save himself trouble He put it in double And instead of coming, he went.

There was a young man of Greenwich Whose balls were all covered...
There was a young man of Greenwich Whose balls were all covered with spinach. So long was his tool That it wound round a spool, And he let it out inach by inach.

Help! I'm trapped in a PDP 11/70!
Help! I'm trapped in a PDP 11/70!

Census Taker to Housewife: Did you ever have the measles, and,...
Census Taker to Housewife: Did you ever have the measles, and, if so, how many?

Cutting the space budget really restores my faith in humanity...
Cutting the space budget really restores my faith in humanity. It eliminates dreams, goals, and ideals and lets us get straight to the business of hate, debauchery, and self-annihilation." -- Johnny Hart

A fellow whose surname was Hunt Trained his cock to perform...
A fellow whose surname was Hunt Trained his cock to perform a slick stunt: This versatile spout Could be turned inside out, Like a glove, and be used as a cunt.

A graduate student named Zac Was said to be great in the sack...
A graduate student named Zac Was said to be great in the sack. An inch of his boner Put girls in a coma And two gave them epileptic attacks.

A young fellow discovered through Freud That although of penis...
A young fellow discovered through Freud That although of penis devoid, He could practice coitus By eating a foetus, And his parents were quite overjoyed.

An Argentine gaucho named Bruno Who said, "Fucking is...
An Argentine gaucho named Bruno Who said, "Fucking is one thing I do know. Women are fine And sheep are divine But llamas are numero uno."

An old maid who had a pet ape Lived in fear of perpetual rape...
An old maid who had a pet ape Lived in fear of perpetual rape. His red, hairy phallus So filled her with malice That she sealed up her snatch with Scotch tape.