Daily Fortunes

Jan 20, 2015

Kids have *never* taken guidance from their parents. If...
Kids have *never* taken guidance from their parents. If you could travel back in time and observe the original primate family in the original tree, you would see the primate parents yelling at the primate teenager for sitting around and sulking all day instead of hunting...

Lies! All lies! You're all lying against my boys! ...
Lies! All lies! You're all lying against my boys! -- Ma Barker

Life does not begin at the moment of conception or the moment...
Life does not begin at the moment of conception or the moment of birth. It begins when the kids leave home and the dog dies.

Life is a sexually transmitted disease with 100% mortality.
Life is a sexually transmitted disease with 100% mortality.

Life is like a diaper -- short and loaded.
Life is like a diaper -- short and loaded.

Daily Fortunes for Jan 20, 2015

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