Daily Fortunes

May 15, 2012

Having children is like having a bowling alley installed...
Having children is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain. -- Martin Mull

How sharper than a serpent's tooth is a sister's...
How sharper than a serpent's tooth is a sister's "See?" -- Linus Van Pelt

"Humpf!" Humpfed a voice! "For almost two days...
"Humpf!" Humpfed a voice! "For almost two days you've run wild and insisted on chatting with persons who've never existed. Such carryings-on in our peaceable jungle! We've had quite enough of you bellowing bungle! And I'm here to state," snapped...

I BET WHEN NEANDERTHAL KIDS would make a snowman, someone would...
I BET WHEN NEANDERTHAL KIDS would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, "Don't forget the thick heavy brows." Then they would get embarrassed because they remembered they had the big hunky brows too, and they'd get mad and eat the snowman...

I called my parents the other night, but I forgot about...
I called my parents the other night, but I forgot about the time difference. They're still living in the fifties. -- Strange de Jim

Daily Fortunes for May 15, 2012

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