Humor: Best of Fortunes for Thursday March 26, 2015

There was a young man from Bengal Who claimed he had only...
There was a young man from Bengal Who claimed he had only one ball, But two little bitches Pulled down this man's breeches And proved he had nothing at all.

There was a young man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long...
There was a young man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, While wiping his chin, "If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it."

Another war ... must it always be so? How many comrades have...
Another war ... must it always be so? How many comrades have we lost in this way? ... Obedience. Duty. Death, and more death ... -- Romulan Commander, "Balance of Terror", stardate 1709.2

Death didn't answer. He was looking at Spold in the same...
Death didn't answer. He was looking at Spold in the same way as a dog looks at a bone, only in this case things were more or less the other way around. -- Terry Pratchett, "The Colour of Magic"

Let me not to the marriage of true minds Admit impediments...
Let me not to the marriage of true minds Admit impediments. Love is not love Which alters when it alteration finds, Or bends with the remover to remove: O, no! it is an ever-fixed mark, That looks on tempests and is never shaken; It is the star to every...