Humor: Best of Fortunes for Friday January 27, 2017

2180, U.S. History question: What 20th Century U.S...
2180, U.S. History question: What 20th Century U.S. President was almost impeached and what office did he later hold?

A bather whose clothing was strewed By breezes that left...
A bather whose clothing was strewed By breezes that left her quite nude, Saw a man come along And, unless I am wrong, You expected this line to be lewd.

There once was a bishop from Birmingham Who deflowered young...
There once was a bishop from Birmingham Who deflowered young girls while confirming 'em. As they knelt on the hassock He lifted his cassock And slipped his episcopal worm in 'em.

There once was a man from Racine, Who invented a screwing...
There once was a man from Racine, Who invented a screwing machine. Both concave and convex, It could please either sex, But, oh, what a bastard to clean!

There was a young harlot from Kew Who filled her vagina with...
There was a young harlot from Kew Who filled her vagina with glue. She said with a grin, "If they pay to get in, They'll pay to get out of it too."

Ladles and Jellyspoons! I come before you to stand behind...
Ladles and Jellyspoons! I come before you to stand behind you, To tell you something I know nothing about. Since next Thursday will be Good Friday, There will be a fathers' meeting, for mothers only. Wear your best clothes, if you don't have any,...

Raffiniert ist der Herrgott aber boshaft ist er nicht...
Raffiniert ist der Herrgott aber boshaft ist er nicht. -- Albert Einstein