Humor: Best of Fortunes for Wednesday February 1, 2017

As Zeus said to Narcissus, "Watch yourself."
As Zeus said to Narcissus, "Watch yourself."

Wernher von Braun settled for a V-2 when he coulda had a V-8.
Wernher von Braun settled for a V-2 when he coulda had a V-8.

A happy old hooker named Grace Once sponsored a cunt-lapping...
A happy old hooker named Grace Once sponsored a cunt-lapping race. It was hard for beginners To tell who were winners : There were cunt hairs all over the place.

A mortician who practised in Fife Made love to the corpse...
A mortician who practised in Fife Made love to the corpse of his wife. "How could I know, Judge? She was cold, did not budge-- Just the same as she'd acted in life."

There was a gay countess of Bray, And you may think it odd when...
There was a gay countess of Bray, And you may think it odd when I say, That in spite of high station, Rank and education, She always spelled cunt with a 'k'.

There was a young fellow called Clyde Who fell in an outhouse...
There was a young fellow called Clyde Who fell in an outhouse and died. He had a twin brother Who fell in another So now they're interred side by side.