Daily Fortunes

Jun 3, 2015

The President publicly apologized today to all those offended...
The President publicly apologized today to all those offended by his brother's remark, "There's more Arabs in this country than there is Jews!". Those offended include Arabs, Jews, and English teachers. -- Baltimore, Channel 11 News, on Jimmy...

The price of seeking to force our beliefs on others is that...
The price of seeking to force our beliefs on others is that someday they might force their beliefs on us. -- Mario Cuomo

The primary cause of failure in electrical appliances is...
The primary cause of failure in electrical appliances is an expired warranty. Often, you can get an appliance running again simply by changing the warranty expiration date with a 15/64-inch felt-tipped marker. -- Dave Barry, "The Taming of...

The primary purpose of the DATA statement is to give names...
The primary purpose of the DATA statement is to give names to constants; instead of referring to pi as 3.141592653589793 at every appearance, the variable PI can be given that value with a DATA statement and used instead of the longer form of the constant. This also...

The primary requisite for any new tax law is for it to exempt...
The primary requisite for any new tax law is for it to exempt enough voters to win the next election.

Daily Fortunes for Jun 3, 2015

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