Daily FortunesJan 24, 2017
Two friends were out drinking when suddenly one lurched...
Two friends were out drinking when suddenly one lurched backward off his
barstool and lay motionless on the floor.
"One thing about Jim," the other said to the bartender, "he sure
knows when to stop."
Vermouth always makes me brilliant unless it makes me idiotic...
Vermouth always makes me brilliant unless it makes me idiotic.
-- E.F. Benson
We don't smoke and we don't chew, and we don't go with girls...
We don't smoke and we don't chew, and we don't go with girls that do.
-- Walter Summers
What scoundrel stole the cork from my lunch?
--...
What scoundrel stole the cork from my lunch?
-- J.D. Farley
When all else fails, pour a pint of Guinness in the gas tank,...
When all else fails, pour a pint of Guinness in the gas tank, advance
the spark 20 degrees, cry "God Save the Queen!", and pull the starter knob.
-- MG "Series MGA" Workshop Manual
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Daily Fortunes for Jan 24, 2017
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