Linux Definitions

                William Safire's Rules for Writers:

Remember to never split an infinitive.  The passive voice should never be
used.  Do not put statements in the negative form.  Verbs have to agree with
their subjects.  Proofread carefully to see if you words out.  If you reread
your work, you can find on rereading a great deal of repetition can be
avoided by rereading and editing.  A writer must not shift your point of
view.  And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.  (Remember, too, a
preposition is a terrible word to end a sentence with.) Don't overuse
exclamation marks!!  Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long
sentences, as of 10 or more words, to their antecedents.  Writing carefully,
dangling participles must be avoided.  If any word is improper at the end of
a sentence, a linking verb is.  Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixing
metaphors.  Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.  Everyone should be
careful to use a singular pronoun with singular nouns in their writing.
Always pick on the correct idiom.  The adverb always follows the verb.  Last
but not least, avoid cliches like the plague; seek viable alternatives.

Williams and Holland's Law:
        If enough data is collected, anything may be proven by statistical
        methods.

Wilner's Observation:
        All conversations with a potato should be conducted in private.

Wit, n.:
        The salt with which the American Humorist spoils his cookery
        ... by leaving it out.
                -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"

wok, n.:
        Something to thwow at a wabbit.

wolf, n.:
        A man who knows all the ankles.

Wombat's Laws of Computer Selection:
        (1) If it doesn't run Unix, forget it.
        (2) Any computer design over 10 years old is obsolete.
        (3) Anything made by IBM is junk. (See number 2)
        (4) The minimum acceptable CPU power for a single user is a
            VAX/780 with a floating point accelerator.
        (5) Any computer with a mouse is worthless.
                -- Rich Kulawiec

Woodward's Law:
        A theory is better than its explanation.

Woolsey-Swanson Rule:
        People would rather live with a problem they cannot
        solve rather than accept a solution they cannot understand.

Work Rule: Leave of Absence (for an Operation):
        We are no longer allowing this practice.  We wish to discourage any
thoughts that you may not need all of whatever you have, and you should not
consider having anything removed.  We hired you as you are, and to have
anything removed would certainly make you less than we bargained for.