| Linux Definitions: 209 of 1105 |
Concept, n.:
Any "idea" for which an outside consultant billed you more than
$25,000.
|
|
| |
| Linux Definitions: 210 of 1105 |
Conference, n.:
A special meeting in which the boss gathers subordinates to hear
what they have to say, so long as it doesn't conflict with what
he's already decided to do.
|
|
| |
| Linux Definitions: 211 of 1105 |
Confidant, confidante, n:
One entrusted by A with the secrets of B, confided to himself by C.
-- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
|
|
| |
| Linux Definitions: 212 of 1105 |
Confirmed bachelor:
A man who goes through life without a hitch.
|
|
| |
| Linux Definitions: 213 of 1105 |
Conjecture: All odd numbers are prime.
Mathematician's Proof:
3 is prime. 5 is prime. 7 is prime. By induction, all
odd numbers are prime.
Physicist's Proof:
3 is prime. 5 is prime. 7 is prime. 9 is experimental
error. 11 is prime. 13 is prime ...
Engineer's Proof:
3 is prime. 5 is prime. 7 is prime. 9 is prime.
11 is prime. 13 is prime ...
Computer Scientists's Proof:
3 is prime. 3 is prime. 3 is prime. 3 is prime...
|
|
| |
| Linux Definitions: 214 of 1105 |
Connector Conspiracy, n:
[probably came into prominence with the appearance of the KL-10,
none of whose connectors match anything else] The tendency of
manufacturers (or, by extension, programmers or purveyors of anything)
to come up with new products which don't fit together with the old
stuff, thereby making you buy either all new stuff or expensive
interface devices.
|
|
| |
| Linux Definitions: 215 of 1105 |
Consent decree:
A document in which a hapless company consents never to commit
in the future whatever heinous violations of Federal law it
never admitted to in the first place.
|
|
| |
| Linux Definitions: 216 of 1105 |
Consultant, n.:
(1) Someone you pay to take the watch off your wrist and tell
you what time it is. (2) (For resume use) The working title
of anyone who doesn't currently hold a job. Motto: Have
Calculator, Will Travel.
|
|
| |
| Linux Definitions: 217 of 1105 |
Consultant, n.:
[From con "to defraud, dupe, swindle," or, possibly, French con
(vulgar) "a person of little merit" + sult elliptical form of
"insult."] A tipster disguised as an oracle, especially one who
has learned to decamp at high speed in spite of a large briefcase
and heavy wallet.
|
|
| |
| Linux Definitions: 218 of 1105 |
Consultant, n.:
An ordinary man a long way from home.
|
|
