Linux Definitions

Penguin Trivia #46:
        Animals who are not penguins can only wish they were.
                -- Chicago Reader 10/15/82

pension:
        A federally insured chain letter.

People's Action Rules:
        (1) Some people who can, shouldn't.
        (2) Some people who should, won't.
        (3) Some people who shouldn't, will.
        (4) Some people who can't, will try, regardless.
        (5) Some people who shouldn't, but try, will then blame others.

perfect guest:
        One who makes his host feel at home.

Performance:
        A statement of the speed at which a computer system works.  Or
        rather, might work under certain circumstances.  Or was rumored
        to be working over in Jersey about a month ago.

pessimist:
        A man who spends all his time worrying about how he can keep the
        wolf from the door.

optimist:
        A man who refuses to see the wolf until he seizes the seat of
        his pants.

opportunist:
        A man who invites the wolf in and appears the next day in a fur coat.

Peter's Law of Substitution:
        Look after the molehills, and the
        mountains will look after themselves.

Peter's Principle of Success:
        Get up one time more than you're knocked down.

Peterson's Admonition:
        When you think you're going down for the third time --
        just remember that you may have counted wrong.

Peterson's Rules:
        (1) Trucks that overturn on freeways are filled with something sticky.
        (2) No cute baby in a carriage is ever a girl when called one.
        (3) Things that tick are not always clocks.
        (4) Suicide only works when you're bluffing.

petribar:
        Any sun-bleached prehistoric candy that has been sitting in
        the window of a vending machine too long.
                -- Rich Hall, "Sniglets"