Humor: Best of Fortunes for Wednesday August 9, 2006

ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken...
ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und corkenpoppen mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken by das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in...

Canada Bill Jones's Motto: It's morally wrong to allow...
Canada Bill Jones's Motto: It's morally wrong to allow suckers to keep their money. Canada Bill Jones's Supplement: A Smith and Wesson beats four aces.

The New Testament offers the basis for modern computer coding...
The New Testament offers the basis for modern computer coding theory, in the form of an affirmation of the binary number system. But let your communication be Yea, yea; nay, nay: for whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil...

The nation that controls magnetism controls the universe...
The nation that controls magnetism controls the universe. -- Chester Gould/Dick Tracy

The net of law is spread so wide, No sinner from its sweep...
The net of law is spread so wide, No sinner from its sweep may hide. Its meshes are so fine and strong, They take in every child of wrong. O wondrous web of mystery! Big fish alone escape from thee! -- James Jeffrey Roche

The next thing I say to you will be true. The last thing I said...
The next thing I say to you will be true. The last thing I said was false.

HOGAN'S HEROES DRINKING GAME -- Take a shot every...
HOGAN'S HEROES DRINKING GAME -- Take a shot every time: -- Sergeant Schultz says, "I knoooooowww nooooothing!" -- General Burkhalter or Major Hochstetter intimidate/insult Colonel Klink. -- Colonel Klink falls for Colonel Hogan's...

You will overcome the attacks of jealous associates.
You will overcome the attacks of jealous associates.

Marriage is the waste-paper basket of the emotions.
Marriage is the waste-paper basket of the emotions.