Humor: Best of Fortunes for Friday October 5, 2018

A doctor, an architect, and a computer scientist were...
A doctor, an architect, and a computer scientist were arguing about whose profession was the oldest. In the course of their arguments, they got all the way back to the Garden of Eden, whereupon the doctor said, "The medical profession is clearly...

ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken...
ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und corkenpoppen mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken by das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in...

JACK AND THE BEANSTACK by Mark...
JACK AND THE BEANSTACK by Mark Isaak Long ago, in a finite state far away, there lived a JOVIAL character named Jack. Jack and his relations were poor. Often their hash table was bare. One day Jack's parent said...

A computer, to print out a fact, Will divide, multiply,...
A computer, to print out a fact, Will divide, multiply, and subtract. But this output can be No more than debris, If the input was short of exact. -- Gigo

An ARPAnaut name of Corvette Had a fetish involving the net...
An ARPAnaut name of Corvette Had a fetish involving the net. As he fondled his IMP His cock went from limp To as hard as concrete which has set.

An arrogant wench from Salt Lake Liked to tease all the boys...
An arrogant wench from Salt Lake Liked to tease all the boys on the make. She was finally the prize Of a man twice her size And all she recalls is the ache.

There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in...
There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in a bucket. His daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man, And as for the bucket, Nantucket. The pair of them went to Manhasset, (Nan and the man with the asset.)...

There was a young girl of Cape Town Who usually fucked with...
There was a young girl of Cape Town Who usually fucked with a clown. He taught her the trick Of sucking his prick, And when it went up -- she went down.

There was a young man of Cape Horn Who wished he had never been...
There was a young man of Cape Horn Who wished he had never been born, And he wouldn't have been If his father had seen That the end of the rubber was torn.

There were three young ladies of Birmingham, And this is...
There were three young ladies of Birmingham, And this is the scandal concerning 'em. They lifted the frock And tickled the cock Of the Bishop engaged in confirming 'em. Now, the Bishop was nobody's fool, He'd been to a good public...