Daily FortunesMar 29, 2012
Nothing increases your golf score like witnesses.
Nothing increases your golf score like witnesses.
Now there's three things you can do in a baseball game: you...
Now there's three things you can do in a baseball game: you can win
or you can lose or it can rain.
-- Casey Stengel
"Oh, he [a big dog] hunts with papa," she said...
"Oh, he [a big dog] hunts with papa," she said. "He says Don Carlos [the
dog] is good for almost every kind of game. He went duck hunting one time
and did real well at it. Then Papa bought some ducks, not wild ducks but,
you know, farm ducks. And it...
On Thanksgiving Day all over America, families sit down...
On Thanksgiving Day all over America, families sit down to dinner at the
same moment -- halftime.
Once there was this conductor see, who had a bass problem...
Once there was this conductor see, who had a bass problem. You see, during
a portion of Beethovan's Ninth Symphony in which there are no bass violin
parts, one of the bassists always passed a bottle of scotch around. So,
to remind himself that the basses usually required...
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Daily Fortunes for Mar 29, 2012
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