Daily Fortunes

May 14, 2015

The universe does not have laws -- it has habits, and habits...
The universe does not have laws -- it has habits, and habits can be broken.

The universe is like a safe to which there is a combination --...
The universe is like a safe to which there is a combination -- but the combination is locked up in the safe. -- Peter DeVries

The University of California Bears announced the signing...
The University of California Bears announced the signing of Reggie Philbin to a letter of intent to attend Cal next Fall. Philbin is said to make up for no talent by cheating well. Says Philbin of his decision to attend Cal, "I'm in it for the free ride."

The USA is so enormous, and so numerous are its schools,...
The USA is so enormous, and so numerous are its schools, colleges and religious seminaries, many devoted to special religious beliefs ranging from the unorthodox to the dotty, that we can hardly wonder at its yielding a more bounteous harvest of gobbledygook than the rest...

The verdict of a jury is the a priori opinion of that juror...
The verdict of a jury is the a priori opinion of that juror who smokes the worst cigars. -- H. L. Mencken

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