Freebsd Limericks

There was a young fellow from Florida
Who liked a friend's wife, so he borrowed her.
        When they got into bed
        He cried, "God strike me dead!
This ain't a cunt -- it's a corridor!"

There was a young fellow from Kent
Whose cock was so long that it bent
        To save himself trouble
        He put it in double
And instead of coming, he went.

There was a young fellow from Leeds
Who swallowed a package of seeds.
        Great tufts of grass
        Sprouted out of his ass
And his balls were all covered with weeds.

There was a young fellow from Parma
Who was solemnly screwing his charmer.
        Said the damsel demure,
        "You'll excuse me, I'm sure,
But I must say you fuck like a farmer."

There was a young fellow name Tucker
Who, instructing a novice cock-sucker,
        Said, "Don't bow out your lips
        Like an elephant's hips,
The boys like it best when they pucker."

There was a young fellow named Ades
Whose favorite fruit was young maids.
        But sheep, nigger boys, whores,
        And the knot holes in doors
Were by no means exempt from his raids.

There was a young fellow named Babbitt
Who could screw nine times like a rabbit,
        But a girl from Johore
        Could do it twice more,
Which was just enough extra to crab it.

There was a young fellow named Bill,
Who took an atomic pill,
        His navel corroded,
        His asshole exploded,
And they found his nuts in Brazil.

There was a young fellow named Blaine,
And he screwed some disgusting old jane.
        She was ugly and smelly
        With an awful pot-belly,
But... well, they were caught in the rain.

There was a young fellow named Bliss
Whose sex life was strangely amiss,
        For even with Venus
        His recalcitrant penis
Would never do better than t
                           h
                           i
                           s
                           .