Freebsd Limericks

There was a young man from Dallas
Who had an exceptional phallus.
        He couldn't find room
        In any girl's womb
Without rubbing it first with Vitalis.

There was a young man from Dundee
Who buggered an ape in a tree.
        The results were quite horrid:
        All ass and no forehead,
Three balls and a purple goatee.

There was a young man from East Lizes
Whose balls were of two different sizes
        One was so small
        It was no ball at all
The other was large and won prizes.

There was a young man from East Wubley
Whose cock was bifurcated doubly.
        Each quadruplicate shaft
        Had two balls hanging aft,
And the general effect was quite lovely.

There was a young man from Hong Kong
Who had a trifurcated prong:
        A small one for sucking,
        A large one for fucking,
And a `boney' for beating a gong.

There was a young man from Glengozzle
Who found a remarkable fossil.
        He knew by the bend
        And the wart on the end,
'Twas the peter of Paul the Apostle.

There was a young man from Jodhpur
Who found he could easily cure
        His dread diabetes
        By eating a foetus
Served up in a sauce of manure.

There was a young man from Kent
Whose tool was so long that it bent.
        To save himself trouble
        He put it in double
And instead of coming, he went.

There was a young man from Lynn
Whose cock was the size of a pin.
        Said his girl with a laugh
        As she felt his staff,
"This won't be much of a sin."

There was a young man from Maine
Whose prick was as strong as a crane;
        It was almost as long,
        So he strolled with his dong
Extended in sunshine and rain.

There was a young man from Nantucket
Whose cock was so long he could suck it.
        But he looked in the glass,
        And saw his own ass,
And broke his neck trying to fuck it.