Freebsd Limericks

There was a young fellow from Parma
Who was solemnly screwing his charmer.
        Said the damsel demure,
        "You'll excuse me, I'm sure,
But I must say you fuck like a farmer."

There was a young fellow name Tucker
Who, instructing a novice cock-sucker,
        Said, "Don't bow out your lips
        Like an elephant's hips,
The boys like it best when they pucker."

There was a young fellow named Ades
Whose favorite fruit was young maids.
        But sheep, nigger boys, whores,
        And the knot holes in doors
Were by no means exempt from his raids.

There was a young fellow named Babbitt
Who could screw nine times like a rabbit,
        But a girl from Johore
        Could do it twice more,
Which was just enough extra to crab it.

There was a young fellow named Bill,
Who took an atomic pill,
        His navel corroded,
        His asshole exploded,
And they found his nuts in Brazil.

There was a young fellow named Blaine,
And he screwed some disgusting old jane.
        She was ugly and smelly
        With an awful pot-belly,
But... well, they were caught in the rain.

There was a young fellow named Bliss
Whose sex life was strangely amiss,
        For even with Venus
        His recalcitrant penis
Would never do better than t
                           h
                           i
                           s
                           .

There was a young fellow named Bowen
Whose pecker kept growin' and growin'.
        It grew so tremendous,
        So long and so pendulous,
'Twas no good for fuckin' -- just showin'.

There was a young fellow named Brewer
Whose girl made her home in a sewer.
        Thus he, the poor soul,
        Could get into her hole,
And still not be able to screw her!

There was a young fellow named Case
Who entered a cunt-lapping race.
        He licked his way clean
        Through Number thirteen,
But then slipped and got pissed in the face.