Freebsd Limericks

A widow whose singular vice
Was to keep her late husband on ice
        Said, "It's been hard since I lost him --
        I'll never defrost him!
Cold comfort, but cheap at the price."

A wonderful bird is the pelican.
His mouth can hold more than his belican.
        He can take in his beak
        Enough food for a week.
And I'm darned if I know how the helican.

A wonderful bird is the pelican.
His mouth can hold more than his belican.
        He can take in his beak
        Enough food for a week.
I'm darned if I know how the helican.

A wonderful tribe are the Sweenies,
Renowned for the length of their peenies.
        The hair on their balls
        Sweeps the floors of their halls,
But they don't look at women, the meanies.

A wood-fetish busboy named Gable
Is rapid, is thorough, is able;
        But when everything's cleared,
        He gives way to the weird,
As he lovingly busses each table.

A worn-out young husband named Lehr
Her daily his wife's plaintive prayer:
        "Slip on a sheath, quick,
        Then slip your big dick
Between these lips covered with hair."

A worried young man from Stamboul
Discovered red spots on his tool.
        Said the doctor, a cynic,
        "Get out of my clinic
Just wipe off the lipstick, you fool."

A worried young man from Stamboul
Founds lots of red spots on his tool.
        Said the doctor, a cynic,
        "Get out of my clinic;
Just wipe off the lipstick, you fool!"

A young bride and groom of Australia
Remarked as they joined genitalia :
        "Though the system seems odd,
         We are thankful that God
Developed the genus Mammalia."

A young fellow discovered through Freud
That although of penis devoid,
        He could practice coitus
        By eating a foetus,
And his parents were quite overjoyed.