Freebsd Limericks

An ardent young man named Magruder
Once wooed a girl nude in Bermuda.
        She thought it quite lewd
        To be wooed in the nude,
But magruder was shrewder, he screwed her.

An Argentine gaucho named Bruno
Who said, "Fucking is one thing I do know.
        Women are fine
        And sheep are divine
But llamas are numero uno."

An ARPAnaut name of Corvette
Had a fetish involving the net.
        As he fondled his IMP
        His cock went from limp
To as hard as concrete which has set.

An arrogant wench from Salt Lake
Liked to tease all the boys on the make.
        She was finally the prize
        Of a man twice her size
And all she recalls is the ache.

An artist who lived in Australia
Once painted his ass like a Dahlia.
        The drawing was fine,
        The colour - devine,
The scent - ah, that was a failia.

An artist who lived in Australia
Once painted his ass like a Dahlia.
        The drawing was fine,
        The colour - divine,
The scent - ah, that was a failia.

An eager young hacker named Gus
Once buggered a VAX Unibus.
        The hardware went bad,
        But not the young lad
(Except for the toupee and truss).

An eager young hacker named Gus
Once buggered a VAX Unibus.
        The hardware went bad,
        But not the young lad
He didn't expect all that fuss!

An Edwardian father named Udgeon,
Whose offspring provoked him to dudgeon,
        Used on Saturday nights
        To turn down the lights,
And chase them around with a bludgeon.
                -- Edward Gorey

An envious girl named McMeanus
Was jealous of her lover's big penis.
        It was small consolation
        That the rest of the nation
Of women were with her in weeness.