Freebsd Limericks

It always delights me at Hank's
To walk up the old river banks.
        One time in the grass
        I stepped on an ass,
And heard a young girl murmur, "Thanks."

It had snowed, and the man in the drift,
Flagged her down and asked, "Give me a lift?"
        They sat in her Bentley,
        She fondled him gently,
And the lift that he'd asked for was swift!

The late Brigham Young was no neuter --
No faggot, no fairy, no fruiter.
        Where ten thousand virgins
        Succumbed to his urgin's
There now stands the great State of Utah.

The latest reports from Good Hope
State that apes there have pricks thick as rope,
        And fuck high, wide, and free,
        From the top of one tree
To the top of the next -- what a scope!

The limerick, a verse form iniquitous,
Has nonetheless been ubiquitous.
        Once Congress in session,
        Declared its suppression,
But people got around that by writing the last line with no rhyme or meter.

The limerick is furtive and mean;
You must keep her in close quarantine,
        Or she sneaks to the slums
        And promptly becomes
Disorderly, drunk, and obscene.
                -- Morris Bishop

The limerick is furtive and mean;
You must keep her in close quarantine,
        Or she sneaks to the slums
        And promptly becomes
Disorderly, drunk, and obscene.
                -- Morris Bishop

The old archeologist, Throstle,
Discovered a marvelous fossil.
        He knew from its bend
        And the knot on the end,
T'was the penis of Paul the Apostle.

There a young man from the Coast
Who had an affair with a ghost.
        At the height of orgasm
        Said the pallid phantasm,
"I think I can feel it -- almost!"

There once was a bishop from Birmingham
Who deflowered young girls while confirming 'em.
        As they knelt on the hassock
        He lifted his cassock
And slipped his episcopal worm in 'em.