Freebsd Limericks

There was a young gaucho named Bruno
Who said, "There is one thing I do know,
        Women are fine
        And children devine,
But the llama is numero uno."

There was a young German named Ringer
Who was screwing an opera singer.
        Said he with a grin,
        "Well, I've sure got it in!"
Said she, "You mean that ain't your finger?"

There was a young girl from Annista
Who dated a lecherous mister.
        He fondled her titty,
        Got one finger shitty,
Then screwed up his courage and kissed 'er.

There was a young girl from Decatur
Who was raped by an alligator.
        But no one quite knew
        How she relished that screw,
For after he screwed her, he ate her.

There was a young girl from Dundee,
From her fanny there grew a plum tree.
        No one ate the nice fruit,
        To tell you the truth,
Because they knew it came from her tooty-toot-toot.

There was a young girl from East Lynn
Whose mother ( to save her from sin )
        Had filled up her crack
        With hard-setting shellac,
But the boys picked it out with a pin.

There was a young girl from Hong Kong
Who said, "You are utterly wrong
        To say my vagina
        Is the largest in China
Just because of your mean little dong."

There was a young girl from Hong Kong
Whose cervical cap was a gong.
        She said with a yell,
        As a shot rang her bell,
"I'll give you a ding for a dong!"

There was a young girl from Medina
Who could completely control her vagina.
        She could twist it around
        Like the cunts that are found
In Japan, Manchukuo and China.

There was a young girl from New York
Who plugged up her cunt with a cork.
        A woodpecker or two
        Made the grade it is true,
But it totally baffled the stork.

Till along came a man who presented
A tool that was strangely indented.
        With a dizzying twirl
        He punctured that girl,
And thus was the cork-screw invented.