Freebsd Limericks

There was a young girl from the coast
Who, just when she needed it most,
        Lost her Kotex and bled
        All over the bed,
And the head and the beard of her host.

There was a young girl in Berlin
Who eked out a living through sin.
        She didn't mind fucking,
        But much preferred sucking,
And she'd wipe off the pricks on her chin.

There was a young girl in Berlin
Who was fucked by an elderly Finn.
        Though he diddled his best,
        And fucked her with zest,
She kept asking, "Hey, Pop, is it in?"

There was a young girl in Dakota
Had a letter from Ickes; he wrote her:
        "In addition to gas
        We are rationing ass,
And you've greatly exceeded your quota."

There was a young girl name McKnight
Who got drunk with her boy-friend one night.
        She came to in bed,
        With a split maidenhead--
That's the last time she ever was tight.

There was a young girl named Ann Heuser
Who swore that no man could surprise her.
        But Pabst took a chance,
        Found a Schlitz in her pants,
And now she is sadder Budweiser.

There was a young girl named Heather
Whose twitcher was made out of leather.
        She made a queer noise,
        Which attracted the boys,
By flapping the edges together.

There was a young girl named McCall
Whose cunt was exceedingly small,
        But the size of her anus
        Was something quite heinous --
It could hold seven pricks and one ball.

There was a young girl named O'Clare
Whose body was covered with hair.
        It was really quite fun
        To probe with one's gun,
For her quimmy might be anywhere.

There was a young girl named O'Malley
Who wanted to dance in the ballet.
        She got roars of applause
        When she kicked off her drawers,
But her hair and her bush didn't tally.