Freebsd Limericks

There was a young girl of Cape Cod
Who dreamt she'd been buggered by God.
        But it wasn't Jehovah
        That turned the girl over,
'Twas Roger the lodger, the dirty old codger,
        the bugger, the bastard, the sod!

There was a young girl of Cape Town
Who usually fucked with a clown.
        He taught her the trick
        Of sucking his prick,
And when it went up -- she went down.

There was a young girl of Coxsaxie
Whose skirt was more mini than maxi.
        She was fucked at the show
        In the twenty-third row,
And once more going home in the taxi.

There was a young girl of Darjeeling
Who could dance with such exquisite feeling
        There was never a sound
        For miles around
Save of fly-buttons hitting the ceiling.

There was a young girl of Des Moines
Whose cunt could be fitted with coins,
        Till a guy from Hoboken
        Went and dropped in a token,
And now she rides free on the ferry.

There was a young girl of Detroit
Who at fucking was very adroit:
        She could squeeze her vagina
        To a pin-point, or finer,
Or open it out like a quoit.

And she had a friend named Durand
Whose cock could contract or expand.
        He could diddle a midge
        Or the arch of a bridge --
Their performance together was grand!

There was a young girl of East Lynne
Whose mother, to save her from sin,
        Had filled up her crack,
        To the brim with shellac,
But the boys picked it out with a pin.

There was a young girl of Gibraltar
Who was raped as she knelt at the altar.
        It really seems odd
        That a virtuous God
Should answer her prayers and assault her.

There was a young girl of LLewellyn
Whose breasts were as big as a melon.
        They were big it is true,
        But her cunt was big too,
Like a bifocal, full-color, aerial view
Of Cape Horn and the Straits of Magellan.

There was a young girl of Mobile,
Who hymen was made of chilled steel,
        To give her a thrill,
        Took a rotary drill,
Or a number nine emery wheel.