Freebsd Limericks

There was a young girl of Pawtucket
Whose box was as big as a bucket.
        Her boy-friend said, "Toots,
        I'll have to wear boots,
For I see I must muck it, not fuck it."

There was a young girl of Penzance
Who boarded a bus in a trance.
        The passengers fucked her,
        Likewise the conductor,
While the driver shot off in his pants.

There was a young girl of Pitlochry
Who was had by a man in a rockery.
        She said, "Oh! You've come
        All over my bum;
This isn't a fuck -- it's a mockery."

There was a young girl of Rangoon
Who was blocked by the Man in the Moon.
        "Well, it has been great fun,"
        She remarked when he'd done,
"But I'm sorry you came quite so soon."

There was a young girl of Spitzbergen,
Whose people all thought her a virgin,
        Till they found her in bed
        With her twat very red,
And the head of a kid just emergin'.

There was a young girl, very sweet,
Who thought sailors' meat quite a treat.
        When she sat on their lap
        She unbuttoned their flap,
And always had plenty to eat.

There was a young girl who begat
Three babies named Nat, Pat and Tat.
        T'was fun in the breeding
        But hell in the feeding
When she found there's no tit for Tat.

There was a young girl who begat
Three brats, by name Nat, Pat, and Tat.
        It was fun in the breeding,
        But hell in the feeding,
When she found there was no tit for Tat.

There was a young harlot from Kew
Who filled her vagina with glue.
        She said with a grin,
        "If they pay to get in,
They'll pay to get out of it too."

There was a young harlot named Schwartz
Whose cock-pit was studded with warts,
        And they tickled so nice
        She drew a high price
From the studs at the summer resorts.

Her pimp, a young fellow named Biddle,
Was seldom hard up for a diddle,
        For according to rumor
        His tool had a tumor
And a fine row of warts down the middle.