Freebsd Limericks

There was a young girl, very sweet,
Who thought sailors' meat quite a treat.
        When she sat on their lap
        She unbuttoned their flap,
And always had plenty to eat.

There was a young girl who begat
Three babies named Nat, Pat and Tat.
        T'was fun in the breeding
        But hell in the feeding
When she found there's no tit for Tat.

There was a young girl who begat
Three brats, by name Nat, Pat, and Tat.
        It was fun in the breeding,
        But hell in the feeding,
When she found there was no tit for Tat.

There was a young harlot from Kew
Who filled her vagina with glue.
        She said with a grin,
        "If they pay to get in,
They'll pay to get out of it too."

There was a young harlot named Schwartz
Whose cock-pit was studded with warts,
        And they tickled so nice
        She drew a high price
From the studs at the summer resorts.

Her pimp, a young fellow named Biddle,
Was seldom hard up for a diddle,
        For according to rumor
        His tool had a tumor
And a fine row of warts down the middle.

There was a young hayseed from Tiffan
Whose cock would constantly stiffen.
        The knob out in front
        Attracted foul cunt
Which he greatly delighted in sniffin'.

There was a young idler named Blood,
Made a fortune performing at stud,
        With a fifteen-inch peter,
        A double-beat metre,
And a load like the Biblical Flood.

There was a young Jew of Far Rockaway
Whose screams could be heard for a block away.
        Perceiving his error,
        The Rabbi in terror
Cried, "God! I have cut his whole cock away!"

There was a young lad - name of Durcan
Who was always jerkin' his gherkin.
        His father said, "Durcan
        Stop jerkin' your gherkin
Your gherkin's for ferkin', not jerkin'.

There was a young lad from Nahant
Who was made like the Sensitve Plant.
        When asked, "Do you fuck?"
        He replied, "No such luck.
I would if I could but I can't."