Freebsd Limericks

There was a young lady from Norway
Who hung by her heels in a doorway.
        She told her young man,
        "Get off the divan,
I think I've discovered one more way "

There was a young lady from Prentice
Who had an affair with a dentist.
        To make things easier
        He used anesthesia,
And diddled her, `non compos mentis'.

There was a young lady from Rheims
Who amazingly pissed in four streams.
        A friend poked around
        And a fly-button found
Lodged tight in her hole so it seems.

There was a young lady from Rio
Who slept with the Fornier trio.
        As she dropped her panties
        She said, "No andanties
I want this allegro con brio."

There was a young lady from Siam
Who said to her lover, one Kiam,
        "You may kiss me of course,
        But you'll have to use force.
Though god knows you're stronger than I am."

There was a young lady from Spain
Who demurely undressed on a train.
        A helpful young porter
        Helped more than he orter,
And she promptly cried "Help me again"

There was a young lady from Spain
Who got sick as she rode on a train;
        Not once, but again,
        And again, and again,
And again, and again, and again.

There was a young lady from Spain
Whose face was exceedingly plain,
        But her cunt had a pucker
        That made the men fuck her,
Again, and again, and again.

There was a young lady from Troy
Had a moustache, just like a young boy
        Though it tickled to kiss
        'Twas a source of much bliss
When she used it to brush a man's toy.

There was a young lady from Wheeling
Who claimed to lack sexual feeling.
        But a cynic named Boris
        Just touched her clitoris
And she had to be scraped off the ceiling.