Freebsd Limericks

A greedy young lady from Sidney
Liked it in up to her kidney,
        Till a man from Quebec
        Shoved it up to her neck--
He really diddled her, didn' he?

A green-thumbed young farmer from Leeds
Once swallowed a package of seeds.
        In a month, his ass
        Was covered with grass
And his balls were grown over with weeds.

A guest in a household quite charmless
Was informed its eccentric was harmless:
        "If you're caught unawares
        At the head of the stairs,
Just remember, he's eyeless and armless."
                -- Edward Gorey

A habit depraved and unsavory
Held the bishop of Bingham in slavery
        Midst screeches and howls
        He deflowered young owls
Which he kept in an underground aviary

A habit obscene and bizarre,
Has taken a-hold of papa.
        He brings home young camels
        And other odd mammals,
And gives them a go at mama.

A habit obscene and unsavory,
Holds a CS professor in slavery.
        With maniacal howls,
        He deflowers young owls,
That he keeps in an underground aviary.

A hacker who screwed a mag tape
Was caught and convicted of rape.
        To jail he did go,
        From which, to his woe
He couldn't get out with ESC.

A hacker-turned-pervert named Fisk
Made love to the drive of his disk.
        The thing circumsized him,
        Which rather suprised him.
He wasn't aware of *that* risk.

A handsome young rodent named Gratian
As a lifeguard became a sensation.
        All the lady mice waved
        And screamed to be saved
By his mouse-to-mouse resuscitation.

A happy old hooker named Grace
Once sponsored a cunt-lapping race.
        It was hard for beginners
        To tell who were winners :
There were cunt hairs all over the place.