Humor: Best of Fortunes for Monday February 27, 2006

A mighty creature is the germ, Though smaller than...
A mighty creature is the germ, Though smaller than the pachyderm. His customary dwelling place Is deep within the human race. His childish pride he often pleases By giving people strange diseases. Do you, my poppet, feel infirm? You probably contain...

In matters of principle, stand like a rock; in matters...
In matters of principle, stand like a rock; in matters of taste, swim with the current. -- Thomas Jefferson

Please keep your hands off the secretary's reproducing...
Please keep your hands off the secretary's reproducing equipment.

There was a young gaucho named Bruno Who said, "Screwing...
There was a young gaucho named Bruno Who said, "Screwing is one thing I do know. A woman is fine, And a sheep is divine, But a llama is Numero Uno."

There was a young man of Calcutta, Who tried to write...
There was a young man of Calcutta, Who tried to write "cunt" on a shutter. When he got to c-u, A pious Hindoo Knocked him ass-over-head in the gutter.

*** ******* ********* ****** Confucious say: "Is...
*** ******* ********* ****** Confucious say: "Is stuffy inside fortune cookie." ******* ***

Q: How do you keep a moron in suspense?
Q: How do you keep a moron in suspense?