Humor: Best of Fortunes for Tuesday November 21, 2006

I was working on a case. It had to be a case, because...
I was working on a case. It had to be a case, because I couldn't afford a desk. Then I saw her. This tall blond lady. She must have been tall because I was on the third floor. She rolled her deep blue eyes towards me. I picked them up and rolled...

Everything I like is either illegal, immoral or fattening...
Everything I like is either illegal, immoral or fattening. -- Alexander Woollcott

Half of being smart is knowing what you're dumb at.
Half of being smart is knowing what you're dumb at.

Live fast, die young, and leave a good looking corpse...
Live fast, die young, and leave a good looking corpse. -- James Dean

The primary purpose of the DATA statement is to give names...
The primary purpose of the DATA statement is to give names to constants; instead of referring to pi as 3.141592653589793 at every appearance, the variable PI can be given that value with a DATA statement and used instead of the longer form of...

It's amazing how much "mature wisdom" resembles being...
It's amazing how much "mature wisdom" resembles being too tired.

If you fail to plan, plan to fail.
If you fail to plan, plan to fail.