Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Sunday July 17, 2022

A cautious young fellow named Lodge Had seatbelts installed...
A cautious young fellow named Lodge Had seatbelts installed in his Dodge. When his date was strapped in, He committed a sin, Without even leaving his grodge.

There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled some raw gin...
There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled some raw gin on his weeny. Just to be couth, He added vermouth, And slipped his girlfriend a martini.

There once was a man with a hernia Who said to his doctor,...
There once was a man with a hernia Who said to his doctor, "Gol dern ya, When you work on my middle Be sure you don't fiddle With things that do not concern ya."

There once was an old man from Esser, Who's knowledge grew...
There once was an old man from Esser, Who's knowledge grew lesser and lesser. It at last grew so small, He knew nothing at all, And now he's a College Professor.

There was a young lady from Munich Who had an affair with...
There was a young lady from Munich Who had an affair with a eunuch. At the height of their passion He dealt her a ration

There was a young lady of Norway Who hung by her toes in...
There was a young lady of Norway Who hung by her toes in a doorway. She said to her beau "Just look at me Joe I think I've discovered one more way."