Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of August, 2022

In the Garden of Eden lay Adam, Complacently stroking...
In the Garden of Eden lay Adam, Complacently stroking his madam, And loud was his mirth For on all of the earth There were only two balls -- and he had 'em.

There once was a man from Bombay He would do it all night...
There once was a man from Bombay He would do it all night and all day He soon became sore You shoulda' heard him roar When his wife rubbed his balls with Ben-Gay!

There once was a man from Sydney Who could put it up to...
There once was a man from Sydney Who could put it up to her kidney. But the man from Quebec Put it up to her neck; He had a big one, now didn't he?

There was a young fellow of Mayence Who fucked his own arse...
There was a young fellow of Mayence Who fucked his own arse in defiance Not only of custom And morals, dad-bust him, But of most of the known laws of science.

There was a young lady from Wooster Who complained that...
There was a young lady from Wooster Who complained that too many men gooster. So she traded her scanties For sandpaper panties, Now they goose her much less than they used 'ter.

The longer I am out of office, the more infallible I appear...
The longer I am out of office, the more infallible I appear to myself. -- Henry Kissinger

VYARZERZOMANIMORORSEZASSEZANSERAREORSES?
VYARZERZOMANIMORORSEZASSEZANSERAREORSES?

A cautious young fellow named Tunney Had a whang that was worth...
A cautious young fellow named Tunney Had a whang that was worth any money. When eased in half-way, The girl's sigh made him say, "Why the sigh?" "For the rest of it, honey."

A linguist thought it a farce That memory space was so sparse...
A linguist thought it a farce That memory space was so sparse. One day they increased it. Said he as he seized it: "At last! Enough core for the parse".

A nasty old drunk in Carmel Thinks it funny to piss in...
A nasty old drunk in Carmel Thinks it funny to piss in the well. He says, "Some don't favor That unusual flavor, But I don't drink the stuff -- what the hell!"