Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Wednesday December 10, 2014

When the weight of the paperwork equals the weight of...
When the weight of the paperwork equals the weight of the plane, the plane will fly. -- Donald Douglas

There once was a man from Nantucket Whose dick was so long...
There once was a man from Nantucket Whose dick was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin As he wiped off his chin, "If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it."

There once was a man from Sandem Who was making his girl on...
There once was a man from Sandem Who was making his girl on a tandem. At the peak of the make She jammed on the brake And scattered his semen at random.

I've finally found the perfect girl, I couldn't ask...
I've finally found the perfect girl, I couldn't ask for more, She's deaf and dumb and over-sexed, And owns a liquor store.