Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of February, 2025

There once was a girl from Spokane, Went to bed with...
There once was a girl from Spokane, Went to bed with a one-legged man. She said, "I know you-- You've really got two! Why didn't you say so when we began?"

Dawn, n.: The time when men of reason go to bed...
Dawn, n.: The time when men of reason go to bed. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"

Your lucky number is 3552664958674928. Watch for it everywhere.
Your lucky number is 3552664958674928. Watch for it everywhere.

A mathematician named Hall Has a hexahedronical ball, ...
A mathematician named Hall Has a hexahedronical ball, And the cube of its weight Times his pecker's, plus eight Is his phone number -- give him a call...

A mortician who practised in Fife Made love to the corpse...
A mortician who practised in Fife Made love to the corpse of his wife. "How could I know, Judge? She was cold, did not budge-- Just the same as she'd acted in life."

A pretty young lady named Vogel Once sat herself down on...
A pretty young lady named Vogel Once sat herself down on a molehill. A curious mole Nosed into her hole- Ms. Vogel's ok, but the mole's ill.

A pretty young lady named Vogel Once sat herself down on...
A pretty young lady named Vogel Once sat herself down on a molehill. A curious mole Nosed into her hole -- Ms. Vogel's okay, but the mole's ill.

In the Garden of Eden lay Adam, Complacently stroking...
In the Garden of Eden lay Adam, Complacently stroking his madam, And loud was his mirth For on all of the earth There were only two balls -- and he had 'em.

There once was a bishop from Birmingham Who deflowered young...
There once was a bishop from Birmingham Who deflowered young girls while confirming 'em. As they knelt on the hassock He lifted his cassock And slipped his episcopal worm in 'em.

There once was a fellow named Sweeney Who spilled gin all over...
There once was a fellow named Sweeney Who spilled gin all over his weenie. Not being uncouth, He added vermouth And slipped his amour a martini.