Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of January, 2025

-- Gifts for Children -- This is easy. You never have...
-- Gifts for Children -- This is easy. You never have to figure out what to get for children, because they will tell you exactly what they want. They spend months and months researching these kinds of things by watching Saturday- morning cartoon-show...

A chippy who worked in Black Bluff Had a pussy as large as...
A chippy who worked in Black Bluff Had a pussy as large as a muff. It had room for both hands And some intimate glands, And was soft as a little duck's fluff.

A petulant man once said, "Pish, Your cunt is as big as...
A petulant man once said, "Pish, Your cunt is as big as a dish." She replied, "Why, you fool, With your limp little tool, It's like driving a pin with a fish."

A rapturous young fellatrix One day was at work on five...
A rapturous young fellatrix One day was at work on five pricks. With an unholy cry She whipped out her glass eye: "Tell the boys I can now take on six."

An old couple just at Shrovetide Were having a piece -- when...
An old couple just at Shrovetide Were having a piece -- when he died. The wife for a week Sat tight on his peak, And bounced up and down as she cried.

There was a young girl named Heather Whose twitcher was made...
There was a young girl named Heather Whose twitcher was made out of leather. She made a queer noise, Which attracted the boys, By flapping the edges together.

There was a young girl of Aberystwyth Who took grain to...
There was a young girl of Aberystwyth Who took grain to the mill to get grist with. The miller's sun, Jack, Laid her flat on her back, And united the organs they pissed with.

There was a young lady named Brent With a cunt of enormous...
There was a young lady named Brent With a cunt of enormous extent, And so deep and so wide, The acoustics inside Were so good you could hear when you spent.

Don't kiss an elephant on the lips today.
Don't kiss an elephant on the lips today.

Q: How many elephants can you fit in a VW Bug? A: ...
Q: How many elephants can you fit in a VW Bug? A: Four. Two in the front, two in the back. Q: How can you tell if an elephant is in your refrigerator? A: There's a footprint in the mayo. Q: How can you tell if two elephants...