Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Sunday May 31, 2015

There once was a man from Nantucket Whose dick was so long...
There once was a man from Nantucket Whose dick was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin As he wiped off his chin, "If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it."

There was once a mechanic named Bench Whose best tool was...
There was once a mechanic named Bench Whose best tool was a sturdy gut-wrench. With this vibrant device He could reach, in a trice, The innermost parts of a wench.