Humor: Best of Fortunes for Monday March 31, 2008

... I don't like FRANK SINATRA or his CHILDREN.
... I don't like FRANK SINATRA or his CHILDREN.

Hold the MAYO & pass the COSMIC AWARENESS ...
Hold the MAYO & pass the COSMIC AWARENESS ...

How do I get HOME?
How do I get HOME?

I guess you guys got BIG MUSCLES from doing too much STUDYING!
I guess you guys got BIG MUSCLES from doing too much STUDYING!

I'm ZIPPY the PINHEAD and I'm totally committed to the festive...
I'm ZIPPY the PINHEAD and I'm totally committed to the festive mode.

I'm wet! I'm wild!
I'm wet! I'm wild!

There is no TRUTH. There is no REALITY. There is...
There is no TRUTH. There is no REALITY. There is no CONSISTENCY. There are no ABSOLUTE STATEMENTS. I'm very probably wrong.

We place two copies of PEOPLE magazine in a DARK, HUMID mobile...
We place two copies of PEOPLE magazine in a DARK, HUMID mobile home. 45 minutes later CYNDI LAUPER emerges wearing a BIRD CAGE on her head!

does your DRESSING ROOM have enough ASPARAGUS?
does your DRESSING ROOM have enough ASPARAGUS?