Humor: Best of Fortunes for Thursday December 17, 2015

There once was a man named Lodge, who had seatbelts installed...
There once was a man named Lodge, who had seatbelts installed in his Dodge. When his date was strapped in, He committed a sin, without ever leaving the garage.

There was a young plumber named Lee Who was plumbing his girl...
There was a young plumber named Lee Who was plumbing his girl by the sea. She said, "Stop your plumbing, There's somebody coming" Said the plumber, still plumbing, "It's me."

The Pig, if I am not mistaken, Gives us ham and pork...
The Pig, if I am not mistaken, Gives us ham and pork and Bacon. Let others think his heart is big, I think it stupid of the Pig. -- Ogden Nash