Humor: Best of Fortunes for Sunday April 1, 2018

There once was a girl from Madras Who had such a beautiful...
There once was a girl from Madras Who had such a beautiful ass - It was not round and pink (As you bastards think) But had two ears, a tail, and ate grass.

There once was a girl named Irene Who lived on distilled...
There once was a girl named Irene Who lived on distilled kerosene But she started absorbin' A new hydrocarbon And since then has never benzene.

There once was a girl so lovely, Who wanted to make love in...
There once was a girl so lovely, Who wanted to make love in the bubbly, She strapped on her tanks, And started her pranks, But the lobsters all thought she was ugly.

There once was a golfer named Leer, Who got put in the clink...
There once was a golfer named Leer, Who got put in the clink for a year, For an action obscene, On the very first green. Where the sign said "Enter course here."

There once was a lady named Clair, Who posessed a magnificent...
There once was a lady named Clair, Who posessed a magnificent pair. Or that's what I thought, Till I saw one get caught, On a thorn and begin losing air.