Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Friday April 26, 2019

There was a young lady of Ealing And her lover before her...
There was a young lady of Ealing And her lover before her was kneeling. Said she, "Dearest Jim, Take your hands off my quim; I much prefer fucking to feeling."

The Pig, if I am not mistaken, Gives us ham and pork...
The Pig, if I am not mistaken, Gives us ham and pork and Bacon. Let others think his heart is big, I think it stupid of the Pig. -- Ogden Nash