Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Friday May 5, 2023

A horny young fellow named Reg, Was jerking off under a hedge...
A horny young fellow named Reg, Was jerking off under a hedge. The gardener drew near With a huge pruning shear, And trimmed off the edge of his wedge.

A licentious old justice of Salem Used to catch all the harlots...
A licentious old justice of Salem Used to catch all the harlots and jail 'em. But instead of a fine He would stand them in line, With his common-law tool to impale 'em.

There was a young lady of Lincoln Who said that her cunt was...
There was a young lady of Lincoln Who said that her cunt was a pink'un, So she had a prick lent her Which turned it magenta, This artful old lady of Lincoln.

After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something...
After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles." -- Ronnie Shakes

If you stick a stock of liquor in your locker, It is slick...
If you stick a stock of liquor in your locker, It is slick to stick a lock upon your stock. Or some joker who is slicker, Will trick you of your liquor, If you fail to lock your liquor with a lock.