Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of January, 2023

An artist who lived in Australia Once painted his ass like...
An artist who lived in Australia Once painted his ass like a Dahlia. The drawing was fine, The colour - devine, The scent - ah, that was a failia.

There once was a girl from Cornell Whose teats were shaped like...
There once was a girl from Cornell Whose teats were shaped like a bell. When you touched them they shrunk, Except when she was drunk, And then they got bigger than hell.

There once was a man from Nantee Who buggered an ape in...
There once was a man from Nantee Who buggered an ape in a tree. The results were most horrid All ass and no forehead Three balls and a purple goatee.

There was a young lady of Kent, Who admitted she knew what...
There was a young lady of Kent, Who admitted she knew what it meant When men asked her to dine, And plied her with wine, She knew, oh she knew -- but she went!

There was a young man of high station Who was found by a pious...
There was a young man of high station Who was found by a pious relation Making love in a ditch To -- I won't say a bitch -- But a woman of no reputation.

ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken...
ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und corkenpoppen mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken by das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in...

Andrea's Admonition: Never bestow profanity upon...
Andrea's Admonition: Never bestow profanity upon a driver who has wronged you. If you think his window is closed and he can't hear you, it isn't and he can.

Don't plan any hasty moves. You'll be evicted soon anyway.
Don't plan any hasty moves. You'll be evicted soon anyway.

LIFE: That brief interlude between nothingness...
LIFE: That brief interlude between nothingness and eternity.

Someone is speaking well of you. How unusual!
Someone is speaking well of you. How unusual!