Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of February, 2023

There once was a bishop from Birmingham Who deflowered young...
There once was a bishop from Birmingham Who deflowered young girls while confirming 'em. As they knelt on the hassock He lifted his cassock And slipped his episcopal worm in 'em.

There was a young fellow from Leeds Who swallowed a package...
There was a young fellow from Leeds Who swallowed a package of seeds. Great tufts of grass Sprouted out of his ass And his balls were all covered with weeds.

Brain fried -- Core dumped
Brain fried -- Core dumped

Man's unique agony as a species consists in...
Man's unique agony as a species consists in his perpetual conflict between the desire to stand out and the need to blend in. -- Sydney J. Harris

A busy young lady named Gloria Was had by Sir Gerald...
A busy young lady named Gloria Was had by Sir Gerald du Maurier And then by six men, Sir Gerald again, And the band at the Waldorf-Astoria.

A charmer from old Amarillo, Sick of finding strange heads...
A charmer from old Amarillo, Sick of finding strange heads on her pillow, Decided one day That to keep men away She would stuff up her crevice with Brillo.

A contortionist hailing from Lynch Used to rent out his tool...
A contortionist hailing from Lynch Used to rent out his tool by the inch. A foot cost a quid -- He could and he did Stretch it to three in a pinch.

A girl of the Enterprise crew Refused every offer to screw...
A girl of the Enterprise crew Refused every offer to screw. But a Vulcan named Spock Crawled under her smock, And now she is eating for two.

A graduate student named Zac Was said to be great in the sack...
A graduate student named Zac Was said to be great in the sack. An inch of his boner Put girls in a coma And two gave them epileptic attacks.

A lady from Kalamazoo Once found she had nothing to do, ...
A lady from Kalamazoo Once found she had nothing to do, So she sat on the stairs And she counted her hairs: 4,302.