Freebsd Fortunes 4

Hi, I'm Preston A. Mantis, president of Consumers Retail Law Outlet.  As
you can see by my suit and the fact that I have all these books of equal
height on the shelves behind me, I am a trained legal attorney.  Do you have
a car or a job?  Do you ever walk around?  If so, you probably have the
makings of an excellent legal case.  Although of course every case is
different, I would definitely say that based on my experience and training,
there's no reason why you shouldn't come out of this thing with at least a
cabin cruiser.

Remember, at the Preston A. Mantis Consumers Retail Law Outlet, our
motto is:  'It is very difficult to disprove certain kinds of pain.'
                -- Dave Barry

Hi Jimbo.  Dennis.  Really appreciate the help on the income tax.
You wanna help on the audit now?

Hi there!  This is just a note from me, to you, to tell you, the person
reading this note, that I can't think up any more famous quotes, jokes,
nor bizarre stories, so you may as well go home.

Hickery Dickery Dock,
The mice ran up the clock,
The clock struck one,
The others escaped with minor injuries.

Hideously disfigured by an ancient Indian curse?

                WE CAN HELP!

Call (511) 338-0959 for an immediate appointment.

Hier liegt ein Mann ganz ohnegleich;
Im Leibe dick, an Suenden reich.
Wir haben ihn in das Grab gesteckt,     Here lies a man with sundry flaws
Weil es uns duenkt er sei verreckt.     And numerous Sins upon his head;
                                        We buried him today because
                                        As far as we can tell, he's dead.

                -- PDQ Bach's epitaph, as requested by his cousin Betty
                   Sue Bach and written by the local doggeral catcher;
                   "The Definitive Biography of PDQ Bach", Peter Schickele

Higgeldy Piggeldy,
Hamlet of Elsinore
Ruffled the critics by
Dropping this bomb:
"Phooey on Freud and his
Psychoanalysis,
Oedipus, Shmoedipus,
I just loved Mom."

Higgins:        Doolittle, you're either an honest man or a rogue.
Doolittle:      A little of both, Guv'nor.  Like the rest of us, a
                little of both.
                -- Shaw, "Pygmalion"

High heels are a device invented by a woman
who was tired of being kissed on the forehead.

High Priest:    Armaments Chapter One, verses nine through twenty-seven:
Bro. Maynard:   And Saint Attila raised the Holy Hand Grenade up on high
        saying, "Oh Lord, Bless us this Holy Hand Grenade, and with it
        smash our enemies to tiny bits."  And the Lord did grin, and the
        people did feast upon the lambs, and stoats, and orangutans, and
        breakfast cereals, and lima bean-
High Priest:    Skip a bit, brother.
Bro. Maynard:   And then the Lord spake, saying: "First, shalt thou take
        out the holy pin.  Then shalt thou count to three.  No more, no less.
        *Three* shall be the number of the counting, and the number of the
        counting shall be three.  *Four* shalt thou not count, and neither
        count thou two, excepting that thou then goest on to three.  Five is
        RIGHT OUT.  Once the number three, being the third number be reached,
        then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade towards thy foe, who, being
        naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.  Amen.
All:    Amen.
                -- Monty Python, "The Holy Hand Grenade"